= Reflection 感想 =

As a wordsmith and a stickler for meaning, I was not aware of the relation between my work/creativity and sound, until our discussion that, “we can only start to get closer to the true meaning of sound when we learn to forego meaning.” The most inspiring part of this mentorship programme has to be this unlearning process. Only when we depart from our established understanding can we begin to discover the intricate differences of sounds. I wondered once if I had such sensitivity (or imagination), but my doubts eroded as time went by.

I have not had any formal art training, and the learning process from the beginning was very difficult, like learning how to walk again. During the workshops I eliminated what the sounds were not (e.g. whistling was not red) to comprehend my understanding of sound. Interestingly, I seemed to have developed a new perspective for colours and patterns coincident with my newfound understanding of sound.

The soundwalks at the Zoological and Botanical Gardens and the Edward Youde Aviary allowed us to imagine the unimaginable content of bird calls from their tones, frequencies, or emotions. These calls, to my surprise, could tell the physical characteristics of space, like big or small, near or far, open or closed, high or low. I slowly realised how I could apply these experiences on my understanding of space in an exhibition, an understanding of space that has long been numbed by the limited living spaces in Hong Kong. Tai Kwun’s exhibition “Dismantling the Scaffold” was also curated in a way that used the height of space to arrange the works.

While what I have said may seem at a tangent from my relationship with sound, these exercises have helped me develop and broaden my perspective – a new perspective that can probably be found in my future writing and creative works.

對於一個極度執著意義的文字人來說，原本認為自己的工作／創作跟聲音是風馬牛不相及。過程裡面我們討論到「唯有忘記一切意義，才開始觸及聲音真正的意義」，繼而有所啟發。所以，這次「拜師學藝」令我深刻的，是unlearn的過程。當脫離原有的認知，才開始重新發現聲音細緻的差異。我懷疑自己曾經擁有這種感通能力（／想像力），但隨著成長和教育慢慢消失。

我沒有接受過正式的藝術訓練，所以起初的時候，重新學習很困難。透過工作坊，我像學走路一樣，慢慢摸索到用排除法，選出這個聲音不是什麼，（例：口哨的聲音不是紅色的），具體化幫助自己理解對聲音的感知。更加有趣的是在更立體地理解聲音同時，也彷彿有一種新的角度去看顏色、圖案（pattern）等。

在動植物公園和尤德觀鳥園的soundwalk是很深刻的一次經驗，從鳥聲的語調、頻率、情緒想像那些不可被想像的內容；而從這些聲音中，竟然慢慢可以聽出空間的物理特性，範圍大／小，距離近／遠，開揚／封閉，高／低，然後我慢慢發現這些經驗可以遷移到觀看展覽時對空間的感知。這種對空間的感知因為長年累月生活在香港一個又一個私密／小範圍的空間，會慢慢麻木的。後來去最近在大館的《拆棚》展覽，我有留意到策展人嘗試利用空間的高度，處理作品。

雖然，說到這裏，跟聲音的關係好像已經遠了，但這些聲音練習打開了我閱讀的視野和角度。接下來，或者在我的書寫和創作中，也會有一些新的角度，會慢慢滲透出來。